She's not mad at me anymore which is good. And things seem just like they were before but I still have this weird foreboding feeling when I'm around her. Ah well... Oh! All State auditions were on Tuesday and yesterday and I did really well. I'm the third soprano in the entire district so I have a really good chance of getting in. The girl in first is some chick from Swift Creek that I don't know and Shannon is in second. Beth is the fourth alto and Kenna is eighth or something like that... I really just hope that all four of us make it into All State. I'm pretty much almost definitely gonna make it and so is Shannon. Beth and Kenna I worry about though. You know what Kenna told me Beth said? Well, this was a while ago so hopefully her view has changed but she apparently said that she didn't wanna sleep in the same bed as me at All State. A little immature if you ask me... Eh, but whatever. It doesn't really bother me that much. Besides, I have set my conquests on a new victim whose name I shall not disclose at this precise moment. I suppose I'm just sort of laying back until things calm down a little bit. Oh, and the fact that I'm on my period doesn't help. But anyways... Nothing else of interest ever happens to me. Although I still worry about Cassidy sometimes... I hope she's alright. Oh, and one more thing. I finally got wireless internet for my laptop! WOOHOO!!! :D

I hate it when I screw up friendships with other people. It's always my fault too. Why do I even bother to have relationships with other people. It's not like it'd work out anyways. Sometimes I wish I could just give up completely. At least then the world would be happy. Why can't people just accept me for who I am? What's wrong with me? Who are you to say that you're better than me or that I don't deserve to be happy? Why can't you just shut up for once and stop being so prejudice and just let me be? I have no idea what to do and I'm pretty sure she hates me. It's not like I even like her anymore. I'm not gonna rape her in her sleep or anything like that. I'm still the same person aren't I? I'm not any different than I was before. I haven't changed at all. It's her that's changed. Or rather, her view of me. I bet she hates me and is scared of me and doesn't want to look at me ever again. And all I want is to be friends with her. That's it! I don't want anything else from her at all! But it's too late to do anything now. I've already screwed it up and there's nothing that I can do. I guess all I can hope for is the best and that she won't run from me.

Nothing very eventful happened today except Shannon and I both think that The Subject likes me back. Which is great! Teehee! Well, that's it really... I still haven't decided what I wanna be for Halloween. If you have any cool ideas lemme know, okay?

Here it is! My first post in over nine weeks! I usually never have anything interesting to put on here but I decided to post since I was being forced to. So what happened yesterday was really rather fun. I woke up and then I took a bubble bath. It was beatiful but then a moth was in my bathroom and I wanted to set it free but I couldn't. I didn't want it to die or anything. I think it's gone now though... Well, anyways. So after that my dad drove me to Chiles and Cassidyums and Noelani and I were losers together. Then Cassidy's dad came and took us to Cassidy's house. And then we watched Moulin Rouge and Phantom and ate pizza. And then we went to my house and all three of us slept in the same bed. But we didn't get to sleep until three. And then we had to wake up at 7:00 today and none of us wanted to go to church but we went anyways. And I helped out with C-4 which was fun. I got to make popcorn and then I ate a bunch of it. After that we went out to eat at Applebee's because Noelani and Cassidy are picky and neither of them wanted to go to Waffle House or Moe's. And then Cassidy went home and me and Noelani went to my house. And we hung out for a little bit and then we were stalking Erik. After that we went to Shannon's house and woke her up. Then we watched A Hard Day's Night. And then we ran back to my house but Noelani's parents drove by us and wouldn't give us a ride to my house. So we ran all the way home and then Noelani got her stuff and left. And then I worked on my Declaration of Independence project. And then Cassidy called and now I'm posting on here. It really wasn't that interesting though...

I'm rather new here but I thought I'd go ahead and post my first journal entry. So uhmm... Here it is!